Psycheandromida
He Who Wears Sunglasses at Night
Posts : 1503
Join date : 2009-09-25
 | Subject: Facade logs.  Thu Apr 01, 2010 11:44 pm | |
| Grace and Trip are a married couple with problems, so they ask their old friend, Sergio to come break the ice. Join us as we watch Sergio's mission to restore peace to the marraige. Attempt 1: - Spoiler:
FACADE STAGEPLAY
Thu Apr 01 22 33 31 2010
TRIP
Where are the new wine glasses?
GRACE
What for?
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
That should be obvious! -- (interrupted)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
Oh, he's here!
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
GRACE
What?! You told me it'd be an hour from now!
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
No, he's right on time!
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
GRACE
God... Trip!
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP
Sergio!!
TRIP
Ah I'm so happy you could make it! We haven't seen -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
Hail satan
(Trip closes the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
(SERGIO knocks on the front door.)
Attempt 2: - Spoiler:
FACADE STAGEPLAY
Thu Apr 01 22 43 35 2010
TRIP
Where are the new wine glasses?
GRACE
What for?
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
That should be obvious! -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Uhp, he's here!
GRACE
What?! You said he's coming an hour from now!
TRIP
No, he's supposed to be here now!
GRACE
Trip...!
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP
Sergio!!
TRIP
Hey! God it's been so long since we've seen you! How are you doing, man?
SERGIO
GUTEN TAG
TRIP
Uh...
TRIP
Well come on in...
SERGIO
HEIL HITLER
TRIP
Uh, let me go get Grace...
TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)
SERGIO
JA
TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)
(SERGIO picks up the brass bull.)
TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)
(SERGIO puts down the brass bull.)
(SERGIO picks up a martini glass 2.)
(SERGIO puts down a martini glass 2.)
(SERGIO picks up a martini glass 3.)
(SERGIO puts down a martini glass 3.)
GRACE
Sergio,
(SERGIO picks up a martini glass 1.)
(SERGIO puts down a martini glass 1.)
GRACE
Hi! How are you? Oh god it's been such a long time!
SERGIO
guten tag
GRACE
Uh... -- (interrupted)
GRACE
So, come in, make yourself at home...
SERGIO
I am ze Nazi commandant
TRIP
Whoops, I need to go close the door.
TRIP
I'm gonna fix us some drinks.
SERGIO
NO
(Trip closes the front door.)
TRIP
W -- wait, uh, uh -- we need drinks.
TRIP
How about something fun,
SERGIO
WHISKEY
TRIP
like margaritas?
TRIP
Oh yeah, great idea, great idea!
SERGIO
WHISKEY
GRACE
No no,
GRACE
Sergio, maybe you'd like some juice, or a mineral water?
SERGIO
WHISKEY
TRIP
Oh, oh, yeah, that sounds even better! Great!
TRIP
Alright! That's what I wanted to hear! It'll just take me a short minute here.
TRIP
(quiet humming)
GRACE
(little sigh) That's Trip, always happiest when he's making fancy drinks for everyone in the room.
TRIP
Grace, I know what you want, but I'll ask anyway... what would you like to drink?
GRACE
Um, Just a glass of Chardonnay for me, please.
TRIP
Ah, Chardonnay, certainly.
TRIP
Heh heh, Sergio, seeing you brings back good memories, you know?
GRACE
Yes, it does. -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
ja
TRIP
Oh, well, uh, we've, uh... we've missed you.
TRIP
Whoa I just realized something!
GRACE
What...
SERGIO
Heil ze Fuhrer
TRIP
Oh, tonight's -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Here's your wine, Grace.
GRACE
(little sigh)
TRIP
So, yeah, I just realized! -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
Vere ist mein whiskey
TRIP
Oh, yeah, you know, I think I'll fix us another drink in not too long...
TRIP
So, ten years ago... that's when you introduced us, right? -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
WHISKEY
(SERGIO hugs trip.)
(SERGIO hugs trip.)
TRIP
Here's your drink!
(SERGIO picks up a player's drink.)
TRIP
Oh, ha ha, I --
GRACE
Oh, well... you seem to remember how much Trip likes getting attention.
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
TRIP
(annoyed sigh)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
SERGIO
ja
TRIP
Um, well, without you, we wouldn't even -- (interrupted)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
TRIP
Uh -- I - I mean, uh, it's, uh -- it's great you could be here tonight. -- (interrupted)
(SERGIO sips his player's drink.)
(SERGIO kisses trip.)
TRIP
uh... uh, heh heh...
GRACE
uh...
TRIP
(nervous coughing)
GRACE
wha...
SERGIO
HEIL HITLER
TRIP
what...
GRACE
ha ha...
TRIP
ha ha, heh...
GRACE
ha ha ha ha ha!!
TRIP
ha ha ha!
TRIP
Ha ha ha, heh, Sergio,
SERGIO
DO NOT LAUGH
GRACE
heh heh heh...
TRIP
you're out of control, man...!
TRIP
mess with us ...
TRIP
heh heh, you're crazy, you know that?
TRIP
heh, ha ha...
SERGIO
ZE NAZIS ARE SUPREME
TRIP
(big sigh)
TRIP
Anyway, uh... what were we talking about?
SERGIO
HEIL DUTCHLAND
GRACE
So, Sergio, you can help me understand where I went -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
HEIL HITLER
GRACE
Oh, um, well... I want to ask you...
GRACE
Uhh, when I saw this armoire in the store, it seemed to have such a clean, simple look to it...
(SERGIO puts down a player's drink.)
TRIP
Yeah it looks good next to the bar.
SERGIO
SILENCE WENCH
GRACE
Uh, well, this such armoire is such a monstrosity, isn't it?
SERGIO
NO
GRACE
You don't agree...
GRACE
I bet I can return most of this, and start over again on this room...
SERGIO
Okay this accent isn't working
GRACE
Oh, yeah, let me tell you about work! I'm the lead designer on a new project.
SERGIO
Trip is a faggot
SERGIO
and Grace hates Jews
TRIP
uh...
TRIP
You're...
GRACE
Where is... -- (interrupted)
TRIP
uh... uh...
SERGIO
911 was an inside job
TRIP
You said...
GRACE
Let's get the um... the um...
SERGIO
THE PLOT THICKENS
GRACE
We need to check th -- that the, uh -- uh...
TRIP
Yeah...
GRACE
the shampoo bottle thingy...
SERGIO
DO NOT LEAVE
TRIP
we should get that looked at...
GRACE
Oh, yeah, yeah...!
SERGIO
I WILL RAPE YOU
TRIP
You know what, Sergio, that's it, you need to leave.
TRIP
There's -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Okay, -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Alright, -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Okay,
TRIP
We invited you over, but this is just not working out.
SERGIO
let go of me
(Trip opens the front door.)
(Trip closes the front door.)
SERGIO
HEIL HITLER
SERGIO
HEY
Attempt 3: - Spoiler:
FACADE STAGEPLAY
Thu Apr 01 22 49 27 2010
GRACE
Trip, when are you going to get rid of this?
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
(Sergio knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
What, Grace... this? -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Uhp, he's here!
GRACE
What?! You told me it'd be an hour from now!
TRIP
No, he's supposed to be here now!
SERGIO
Open the fucking door
GRACE
God... Trip!
SERGIO
I will rape you
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP
Sergio!!
TRIP
Hi! It's so great to see you! -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
Fuck you bitch
SERGIO
Let me in
(Trip closes the front door.)
GRACE
No, no, here we are!
GRACE
Sergio,
GRACE
Hi! How are you? Oh it's so nice to see you, it feels like it's been forever!
TRIP
Yeah, it has been a long time.
SERGIO
Though you could lock me out?
GRACE
Uh...
GRACE
So, come in, make yourself at home... -- (interrupted)
SERGIO
I AM GOD
GRACE
Aw, ha ha ha!
GRACE
And I have to say, you look great.
(SERGIO kisses trip.)
TRIP
Oh, -- (interrupted)
GRACE
uh...
TRIP
uh...
TRIP
wha...
SERGIO
Now you're gay
TRIP
wha...
GRACE
uuh...
TRIP
ha ha...
GRACE
ha ha ha ha ha, heh...
TRIP
heh, ha ha ha!
GRACE
ha ha ha ha!!
TRIP
Ha ha ha, heh, Sergio,
SERGIO
DO NOT LAUGH
GRACE
heh heh...
TRIP
you're out of control, man...!
SERGIO
I WILL KILL YOU
SERGIO
just kidding
GRACE
I -- I'm not...
SERGIO
ha ha ha
TRIP
uh...
GRACE
what...
TRIP
That's really...
TRIP
Let's get the um... the um...
SERGIO
Or maybe I'm not
TRIP
We need to send a letter to the...
GRACE
Right...
TRIP
that guy we met in the elevator...
GRACE
get that paperwork finished....
TRIP
Oh good idea, yeah, yeah...
SERGIO
That guy is a faggot
TRIP
Alright, Sergio, that's it, you've got to leave.
SERGIO
Fuck the ae- HEY
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP
We'll be fine -- just go.
SERGIO
NO
(Trip closes the front door.)
SERGIO
hhey
SERGIO
HEY
| |
|
