The Epic: Trek of the Scrolls. Day 1.

This is the epic to save Naria, BTW. Day 1. Enjoy. All SF RP.

Gahvin stands at the cart laden with crates, barrels, and bags. He makes sure everything

is properly tied down.
Chris. | Zaku leans on his Katana, letting out a drawn out sigh.
Gahvin: We sigh a lot...
Chris. | Zaku sighs, again.
Gahvin: Ever noticed that?
Chris. | Zaku: I did.
Chris. | Zaku: We also nod alot..
Chris. | Zaku nods.
Naiken Ordal keeps on walking, the bamboo staff being carried on his back
Gahvin nods.
Naiken Ordal: Eyes on the road, morons.
Gahvin finishes tying it down.
Chris. | Zaku drags his Katana behind him, cutting through the ground a bit.
Gahvin: Alright, ready to go.
Chris. | Zaku: Yep..
Gahvin grabs a hold of the bar attached to the cart with ropes. He pulls the cart along,

following Naiken.
Gahvin: Where's Naiko?
Chris. | Zaku lights a cigar'esqe item with his other hand, and puts it in his mouth as

they walk.
Naiken Ordal: Who gives a shit.
Chris. | Zaku: She went ahead.
Chris. | Zaku: Hasty-bitch, she is.
Gahvin: I give a shit....
Chris. | Zaku: SHe's ahead of us.
Naiken Ordal turns to Zaku. "Hey hand me one of those"
Chris. | Zaku opens his satchel, and tosses Naiken a cigar.
Chris. | Zaku: It's gonna' be a looong walk.
Gahvin grunts, annoyed that Naiko didn't tell him this.
Gahvin: Stop complaining...
Gahvin: Want to pull the cart instead?
Chris. | Zaku: Nah' I'm good.
Gahvin: Then shut up...
Chris. | Zaku pulls the cigar out of his mouth, letting out some smoke.
Naiken Ordal takes something from the ground, putting it on his index and thumb
Naiken Ordal snaps his fingers, next to the cigar, it starting a small flame, lighting it

up. Hardcore.
Gahvin 's eyes scan the area around them, as if committing it to memory.
Naiken Ordal: Let us hope we don't get one of your many enemies on the way, Zaku.
Naiken Ordal: I really want to get there within 4 days.
Chris. | Zaku: 'Eh.
Chris. | Zaku: It'll make this more exicting.
Chris. | Zaku: BUt, I hear 'ya.
Gahvin begins to absent-mindedly hum to himself.
Chris. | Zaku spits out to his side, coughing a bit.
Chris. | Zaku puts the cigar back in his mouth.
Gahvin: That shit will kill you....
Chris. | Zaku shrugs.
Chris. | Zaku: Gahvin, I've lived my whole life on the edge.
Naiken Ordal lets go a quite large puff of smoke. "You've got more to loose than me

though"
Chris. | Zaku: Now ain't the time to go preach'n about smoke'n.
Gahvin: You're only 20.
Chris. | Zaku: I'm experienced.
Naiken Ordal: Huh...You're not older than Naria?
Gahvin: No, I'm experienced.
Chris. | Zaku: Nope..
Chris. | Zaku: Naria's older then me.
Gahvin: I'm older than all of you combined.
Chris. | Zaku: You're proud, 'eh?
Gahvin looks at him. "Want me to lie?"
Chris. | Zaku: I do it all the time.
Chris. | Zaku: Er..
Chris. | Zaku: Scratch that.
Gahvin says sarcastically, "And we all thank you for it!"
Chris. | Zaku: I know you do.
Chris. | Zaku: That's why I'm here.
Chris. | Zaku flicks the burnt-out cigar to his side, his Katana slicing through it as he

drags it behind him.
Gahvin: I thought you were here so we can use you as a bargaining chip when we go through

radier territory....
Gahvin: Naiken, you lied to me.
Naiken Ordal: I did?
Chris. | Zaku: Who would want me?
Chris. | Zaku: I mean, other then the woman of course.
Gahvin grumbles, "Now what will I look forward to..."
Naiken Ordal suddenly stops.
Gahvin halts, the cart bumping into his leg.
Gahvin looks about the area.
Naiken Ordal: Okay...Hmm...
Chris. | Zaku keeps walking, not noticing for a few moments, before turning, swivling with

his Katana. "Hm..?"
Gahvin: What is it?
Naiken Ordal examines the area around him, moving the bushes
Naiken Ordal: I know a shortcut, I made it myself.
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken, you know what -always- happens on short-cuts.
Gahvin: Handy...
Chris. | Zaku: We're going to get our asses lost.
Gahvin: Zaku, don't bea cynnic.
Gahvin: //*be a
Naiken Ordal: Well, I got here, didn't I?
Chris. | Zaku: Gahvin, shut.. your non-existant mouth.
Chris. | Zaku: And, true.
Chris. | Zaku: I see your point.
Gahvin: Be quiet, chew-toy. I eat things like you for breakfast.
Chris. | Zaku: Hey, only for the ladies, my friend.
Naiken Ordal: I literally jumped from the grave, and ran here, trust me, I know what I'm

doing.
Gahvin: We're following a zombie? How could this get more interesting?
Chris. | Zaku: We could run into some sucubusses.
Gahvin: Not even in your wildest dreams.
Chris. | Zaku: Hey, it could happen.
Gahvin: Let alone your normal ones...
Naiken Ordal: That's the best case scenario.
Naiken Ordal: Sadly, we're going through the worst case scenario
Gahvin: Naiken...do you find it somewhat discomforting that Zaku speaks of other women

when he's married? And that she's dead?
Naiken Ordal moves two bushes aside, revealing a particulary grim small road.
Naiken Ordal: I don't care much about words.
Naiken Ordal: Now actions. I'm an action person.
Chris. | Zaku: Gahvin, I have to keep my mind off of her, would you rather me sit around

crying, and being all depressed?
Naiken Ordal walks down the newly found road.
Gahvin: It would show that you actually care.
Chris. | Zaku soon follows Naiken, katana drawn.
Gahvin follows.
Chris. | Zaku: If I didn't care, you think I'd walk this?
Gahvin: Dunno.
Naiken Ordal: You would.
Naiken Ordal: If I told you there was chicks on the other end
Chris. | Zaku looks around with shifty-eyes.
Gahvin: It's like he read my mind...
Chris. | Zaku: Not true.
Gahvin: Know what? I'm thankful that I'm loyal.
Chris. | Zaku: And, I love Naria, so you can both shut your mouths.
Naiken Ordal: ** The road goes darker, the denser vegetation blotting out the sunlight **
Chris. | Zaku mumbles. "Yeah, but Naiko ain't."
Naiken Ordal: Zaku, keep the ring hidden.
Gahvin turns to him. "Care to explain that, loud-mouth?"
Naiken Ordal: And, shh.
Chris. | Zaku pulls the ring off of his necklace, tucking it away.
Gahvin 's eyes glow a bit brighter, his sensitive eyes fixing to the darkness.
Gahvin: Strange...
Naiken Ordal looks around, looking for something.
Chris. | Zaku yawns.
Gahvin: Nothing's moving....
Gahvin: No bugs, rodents, anything.
Naiken Ordal: No need to move.
Gahvin: And Zaku, I still didn't forget what you said...
Chris. | Zaku: Good.
Naiken Ordal looks forward. "I suggest you guys speed up"
Chris. | Zaku: Just give'n you a heads up, is all.
Chris. | Zaku brings his Katana up, resting it on his shoulder, as he walks forward.
Naiken Ordal: Is anyone counting steps?
Gahvin: If you were smart, you'd stay away from tender things like that.
Gahvin walks faster. "I take more steps than you do."
Chris. | Zaku: It's the truth Gahvin, no offense.
Gahvin: This is a case where lying is accepted....and Thorn gave a hint that she's been

around...
Naiken Ordal: Wait...
Chris. | Zaku smirks. "I'd count, but I don't know my numbers past a hundred.."
Naiken Ordal recounts the steps he has taken
Naiken Ordal: 225...226...No wait, I skipped 20...
Naiken Ordal: 247...
Naiken Ordal stops
Gahvin halts, ignoring Naiken. "Besides, it's obvious she would have cheated on

Varmithas."
Naiken Ordal: Shit...
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, with half'a Surna.
Gahvin: ....
Chris. | Zaku: I'm just glad I got there first, avoided the diseases.
Naiken Ordal: Shit shit shit, run back.
Naiken Ordal starts running back
Chris. | Zaku: Wh-..
Gahvin begins backing up hastily, pushing the cart.
Gahvin: What is it?!
Naiken Ordal grabs Zaku. "SHIT"
Chris. | Zaku stands there for a moment, blinking.. before turning around and runs back.
Gahvin pushes the cart in a gallop.
Naiken Ordal: ** A shitload of darts start shooting from the trees **
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken, the fuck did you le-..
Chris. | Zaku glances behind him. "Oh shit!"
Naiken Ordal: God fucking damnit...
Gahvin takes a series of darts, but they bounce off his armor harmlessly. The cart becomes

riddled with darts. "WHAT IS THIS!?"
Chris. | Zaku takes a few of the darts to his back, but luckily his plate-mail takes them.
Naiken Ordal: Ok...Ok...I guess I forgot to tell you...
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, you fuckn' did!
Naiken Ordal: There was this chick...This welven chick. She's a psycho.
Gahvin begins passing Naiken and Zaku.
Gahvin: Let me guess...bad date?
Chris. | Zaku: Oh for fucks sake.
Naiken Ordal takes some darts from his arm
Naiken Ordal: Well...Kinda...She's the one who revived me.
Gahvin: But wait, it gets worse....
Chris. | Zaku: This would've been good to know!..
Naiken Ordal: She has this...Mathematic way of calculating shit, so every 250 steps or so,

there's a trap.
Chris. | Zaku: Lemme' guess, she loves 'ya? And 'ya dumped her?... Woman.
Gahvin: At least she has a hobby.
Naiken Ordal: Killer hobby. Did I tell you she was a psycho?
Gahvin: Yes.
Chris. | Zaku: What woman aren't?
Gahvin stops, the cart skidding to a halt.
Naiken Ordal: I guess you can figure out what she revived me for...
Gahvin: We're back at the main road...
Chris. | Zaku: Right..
Naiken Ordal: Yeah, we just skipped a major curve.
Chris. | Zaku: Lets -not- go that way.
Chris. | Zaku: I fuckn' told you, too.
Chris. | Zaku: Nobody listens to the cat-man, ever.
Gahvin: Zaku...shut up...
Gahvin: Why should we listen?
Chris. | Zaku pulls some darts out of his shoulder-pauldron.
Chris. | Zaku: Because we wouldn't have gotten darts in our asses.
Gahvin begins picking darts out of the cart.
Gahvin: Are these poisonous?
Naiken Ordal: Doubt it.
Chris. | Zaku: I sure as hell hope not..
Gahvin: Alright...
Gahvin: So, we go the normal way?
Naiken Ordal: She fired a couple thousand with that trap...So they're probably just for

damage.
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, well I got one up my ass, son of a bitch.
Gahvin: That's nice. I vote we don't take the dangerous psycho short cut.
Chris. | Zaku rips at dart out of the back of his leg.
Naiken Ordal: Eh...
Naiken Ordal: That's gonna be hard to do man.
Naiken Ordal: Any way we go, she'll trap it, she's following us.
Gahvin: ....
Chris. | Zaku: Are you shitting me..?
Naiken Ordal: Why do you think I kept stopping?
Gahvin: You know....
Chris. | Zaku: What is it with these obessive chicks.
Gahvin: It would have been nice if you tod us all this.
Gahvin: //*told
Chris. | Zaku: 'Eh.
Chris. | Zaku: Suprises are fun.
Naiken Ordal: It would, then again, I wanted to speed this shit up
Gahvin: Not really...and ew....
Gahvin: Let's go...
Gahvin: Just count your steps, you oaf.
Naiken Ordal walks, keeping count of his steps.
Gahvin turns around and walks back down the path.
Gahvin: Zaku...remember the ring I showed you?
Naiken Ordal: ** "Oh Naiiiikeeeen" **
Naiken Ordal: Shiiiit...

Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, I d-
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken, the hell does she want from you?
Gahvin looks about. "Her pelt will keep us warm," He says quietly.
Naiken Ordal: Err...What is it, Kari?
Naiken Ordal: ** "Tell your friends to keep walking down the road honey, so I don't have

to brutally murder them" *giggle* **
Chris. | Zaku: Kiss my ass bitch.
Gahvin shouts, "Hey! Bitch! Come out and play! We hate games! Zaku is terrible at playing

them!"
Chris. | Zaku: Oh, fuck you.
Naiken Ordal: ** "I would love to play games, darling, but I'm about a league away from

you" **
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah right, 'bish.
Gahvin whispers, "We make fun of you because we like you. If we didn't like you, we

wouldn't talk to you."
Naiken Ordal: Guys...Just walk down the goddamned road.
Chris. | Zaku flicks Gahvin off.
Gahvin 's eyes wink off and on.
Chris. | Zaku shrugs.
Chris. | Zaku: Right, Naiken, you can go take on your obessive-bitch alone.
Gahvin keeps walking.
Chris. | Zaku: We'll just walk down the road.
Gahvin: So...about the ring...
Chris. | Zaku: And if we're lucky, we'll find ourself some sucubusses am I right?
Chris. | Zaku: Oh.. the ring.
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, what about it?
Gahvin: Well, I asked her.
Chris. | Zaku keeps walking.
Chris. | Zaku: Good.
Naiken Ordal walks, his head down.
Gahvin looks to Zaku. "She said yes."
Chris. | Zaku: Told you.
Chris. | Zaku: And, she already told me.
Chris. | Zaku smirks.
Naiken Ordal: Dude, if you knew her, you'd believe she was a succubus.
Gahvin: Naiko....?
Chris. | Zaku: I don't know why you're complaining.
Gahvin: Or....
Chris. | Zaku: Oh, Naiko you mean? Pfft.
Naiken Ordal: No...The wolf chick
Gahvin: Wait....
Chris. | Zaku: Riiiiight.
Chris. | Zaku: Wolfs?
Chris. | Zaku: Hm.. I wonder how they feel about cats.
Gahvin rolls his upper eye.
Naiken Ordal: We're on 300 right now, right?
Gahvin: Like I said, I take more steps.
Chris. | Zaku: I don't know how to count, remember?
Naiken Ordal: Goddamnit, you guys are gonna get me killed.
Chris. | Zaku: No, -you're- getting yourself killed.
Gahvin: We took 465 steps...
Naiken Ordal: We did? Ah motherfucker...
Gahvin: Here it comes...
Naiken Ordal: ** "Naiiiiikeeeeen, honey" **
Gahvin stops.
Gahvin grabs Zaku with his right leg.
Gahvin: Hang on, let the zombie activate it.
Naiken Ordal: ...What is it...Kari...
Chris. | Zaku: 'Bish, don't go grabbing on my leg.
Chris. | Zaku kicks Gahvin off.
Gahvin: You know...I wonder why I even help you...
Naiken Ordal: ** "Mind the gap" **
Naiken Ordal: What...
Chris. | Zaku: Wh-..
Naiken Ordal: Aw fuck...
Chris. | Zaku: // Zaku should totally fall in
Gahvin stopped, so he watches you twats walk right into the trap.
Chris. | Zaku walks right into the trap. "Oh fu-.."
Naiken Ordal touches one of the sides of the road, it falling off, revealing the road to

actually be a very long plank over a pit of spikes.
Gahvin: Right..."Gahvin, you're an idiot", "Why should we listen to you?", "Thanks for not

helping, Gahvin"....AGH!
Naiken Ordal: Kari, honey, why are you doing to this to me baby...?
Naiken Ordal: ** "Why? WHY?!" **
Gahvin: Stupid question...
Chris. | Zaku: Somone's got their panties in a bunch.
Chris. | Zaku: And it ain't me.
Gahvin: You wear panties....?
Chris. | Zaku looks around with shift-eyes.. "No.."
Gahvin chuckles. "Alright...I'll believe you..."
Naiken Ordal: ** "I'll tell you why! The second I got the ring out, you dashed your ass

out the door!" **
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken, you son of a bitch.
Chris. | Zaku: You know you -can't- say 'No'.
Gahvin: Zaku....
Naiken Ordal: Listen, baby, I love you...Eh...I just think we should get married after 3

days...
Gahvin: Do I have to tie you up, stuff a gag in your mouth, then drag you behind the cart?
Chris. | Zaku: Although that sounds rather kinky, -no-.
Naiken Ordal: ** "THAT WAS THE BEST 3 DAYS OF YOUR LIFE AND YOU KNOW IT! AND DON'T YOU

CALL ME BABY" **
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin: This is stupid....
Chris. | Zaku: Dayyyyy-um.
Chris. | Zaku: Bitch be pissed.
Naiken Ordal: It fucking is...
Gahvin: Let's go around this ditch...
Chris. | Zaku: 'Aye.
Naiken Ordal: ** "Around? Are you bloody daft?" **
Gahvin: Perhaps....
Chris. | Zaku: GAhvin? Yeah, he is.
Gahvin: Not as daft as Zaku, though.
Naiken Ordal: Guys...Look at the sides of the road.
Gahvin looks.
Chris. | Zaku looks.
Naiken Ordal: ** There's an overly dense vegetation around, absolutely unpassable **
Gahvin: I can climb...
Chris. | Zaku: He can climb.
Gahvin: The cart is my concern....
Gahvin: Zaku...
Gahvin: Wait....
Gahvin: We're not stupid, we can solve this...
Chris. | Zaku: Wrong, we -are- stupid.
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken's punk-ass wouldn't accept a simple ring.
Gahvin: Let's cut down a tree, drag it over here, then sling it across.
Gahvin: I mean....
Naiken Ordal: Okay, okay, chill out, I guess I can solve this...
Gahvin: I JUST DID!
Chris. | Zaku: Just go get the damn-ring.
Gahvin: Zaku...chop a tree down.
Chris. | Zaku: With what?
Chris. | Zaku: My teeth?
Gahvin: ....
Gahvin: No...you're dick...
Naiken Ordal: Hey, Kari, baby, I'll marry you, just let me outta here.
Naiken Ordal: ** "AS I EXPEC--You...You will?" **
Chris. | Zaku: I don't know about your dick, but mine ain't sharp.
Gahvin: Seriously, and to think I almost thought you were smart....
Gahvin: There's an axe in my cart.
Chris. | Zaku: Now you tell me.
Gahvin: Zaku...
Gahvin: I love you.
Gahvin: Now get the axe.
Chris. | Zaku goes over, and rummages through it. "I love you too Gahvin."
Gahvin: Good to know.
Chris. | Zaku takes the axe out of the cart.
Gahvin: I think I'll name my child after you. Be it a girl or boy.
Chris. | Zaku: Man-whore?
Chris. | Zaku: That won't be good.
Gahvin: No....
Gahvin: And Faggy-cat-boy won't do either.
Naiken Ordal: ** "Fine then, Naiken. I'll see you on the next 250 steps" **
Gahvin: What do others call you....Zaku?
Gahvin: Right?
Chris. | Zaku: Depnds on who you mean.
Naiken Ordal: ** The road returns to normal, magically **
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin: People who don't know you....
Gahvin: OH BULLSHIT!
Chris. | Zaku throws the axe over his shoulder. "Oh fuck you guys."
Gahvin hums to himself and keeps walking.
Chris. | Zaku: You know what I need? Cat-nip.
Gahvin: I think Naiko is fertile again...
Chris. | Zaku: . .
Chris. | Zaku: Good to know.
Naiken Ordal: GODDAMNIT, just keep walking
Gahvin: Is that the right term?
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin stops.
Gahvin: LISTEN HERE, ZOMBIE!
Naiken Ordal: It's already bad enough I'm getting married for my sister.
Chris. | Zaku keeps walking.
Gahvin: I AM TRYING TO ENJOY MYSELF!
Chris. | Zaku: Naiken, it's a thing all men have to do at some point.
Gahvin keeps walking.
Gahvin says suddenly, "Pregnant! That's the term! I'm so stupid...."
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku gags, holding his stomahe.
Gahvin: What....
Gahvin: NOT IN THIS FORM YOU TWIT!
Chris. | Zaku coughs, and gags.
Naiken Ordal: We'll never be there by this fucking rate.
Gahvin: 215 steps.
Naiken Ordal: Since past trap?
Gahvin: Aye.
Naiken Ordal looks ahead
Naiken Ordal: Wait a minute...
Gahvin: And Zaku needs to grow up...
Naiken Ordal: Wait a fucking minute, there was no tunnel there.
Chris. | Zaku: That's a bad word you said right there.
Gahvin: What is?
Naiken Ordal: ** There's a cave opening in the middle of the road **
Chris. | Zaku: The 'p-word'.
Gahvin: Pregnant?
Chris. | Zaku gags
Gahvin looks to the tunnel.
Naiken Ordal: ** "I know, honey, I'm gonna test your fidelity" **
Gahvin: But...she may be....
Naiken Ordal: Are you shitting me?
Naiken Ordal: ** "No baby, I only did that once and you didn't like it" **
Naiken Ordal: ...
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku: Ew..
Gahvin ignores Naiken's love ordeal. "Zaku...your wife was pregnant..."
Chris. | Zaku looks at Gahvin. "No shit.."
Naiken Ordal: Okay, okay...What do I have to fucking do now, Kari...
Gahvin walks on, towards the tunnel.
Naiken Ordal: And guys, for further mention...Don't talk about shit while around me...
Gahvin: Fuck you...
Chris. | Zaku: Fuck Gahvin.
Chris. | Zaku: He started it.
Gahvin: Sorry Zaku, I'm taken....
Chris. | Zaku: Gahvin, did you know, that if I had some sort of contagiious disease, you

have it too now?
Gahvin stops directly in front of the cave. "What's inside here?"
Naiken Ordal: ** "Well, I put a pretty huge troll to watch our wedding ring! All you have

to do, is kill the troll, take the ring, and walk on" **
Naiken Ordal: Aw shit...
Gahvin: We have weapons.
Chris. | Zaku: We have the ability to seduce.
Gahvin: Or we could feed it Zaku....
Chris. | Zaku: Oh fuck you.
Gahvin: Zaku...
Gahvin turns to him.
Gahvin: No...you don't have enough meat.
Naiken Ordal: ** A gigantic fucking troll packing two battleaxes pops from the cave **
Naiken Ordal: Aw shit...Aw fucking shit...
Gahvin backs up. "Oh...helllo...."
Gahvin: //hang a sec
Chris. | Zaku: That is one big mo'fuckah.
Naiken Ordal: You fucking tell me?
Chris. | Zaku: Who the hell, lets a -troll- of all things watch a wedding ring.
Gahvin: //back
Gahvin: Crazy people?
Naiken Ordal: ** "I'm just crazy for you, Naiken!" **
Naiken Ordal: Shut up, Kari...For gods sakes...
Gahvin backs up behind them and lets go of the cart, stepping forward. "This is either

dedication or an addiction...."
Gahvin: Either is very unhealthy.
Chris. | Zaku: Crazy-bitches, -everywhere- now'adays.
Naiken Ordal: ** The troll sends one of his gigantic axes to Naiken **
Naiken Ordal: Aw son of a bitch!
Naiken Ordal polevaults out of the way with the bamboo staff.
Chris. | Zaku readies his Katana, to attack.
Gahvin suddenly charges forward and leaps at the troll's face, legs outstretched.
Chris. | Zaku tries to bring the Katana down on the hand that struck towards Naiken.
Gahvin grabs onto the beast's face, his talons sinking into its flesh.
Naiken Ordal: ** The trolls sends his other hand to Gahvin **
Gahvin swings about to the back of his head, his talons leaving huge gouges in the flesh.
Gahvin: How did she even.....capture a troll?!
Chris. | Zaku: A big-mother fuckn' net.
Naiken Ordal: ** The troll moves back, recoiling in pain **
Naiken Ordal: She probably fucking summoned it.
Gahvin begins to rip and tear at the abck of its head, ripping away at the skin and

exposing at the skull.
Gahvin: //*back
Gahvin: HELP ME!
Naiken Ordal: Open a hole for me, I'm gonna end this shit
Naiken Ordal polevaults over the troll's head.
Naiken Ordal: ** The troll swings wildly, with both hands **
Gahvin punches at the trolls skull, his foot going straight in with a loud CRUNCH!
Gahvin: This good enough?
Chris. | Zaku just back-steps away from the fight, seemingly useless at the moment, and

opens his satchel, retrieving another cigar.
Naiken Ordal drives the bamboo staff through the troll's skull, right through the forehead
Gahvin uses his foot like a melon scooper, pulling the thing's brains out and throwing

them at Zaku.
Chris. | Zaku leans on his Katana, slipping the cigar into his mouth, watching the fight.
Chris. | Zaku takes a step aside, dodging most of the brain, but gets hit with some stray

splatter.
Naiken Ordal: ** The troll falls slowly, Naiken holding over the troll's forehead with the

bamboo staff stuck to it's skull **
Chris. | Zaku wipes some goo off of himself. "Nice work, guys."
Gahvin leaps off and strides to a safe distance.
Naiken Ordal: ** It hits the ground with a loud thud **
Gahvin says in a bored tone, "Get the ring." He walks over to the cart and lifts the

driving rod, pulling it along.
Chris. | Zaku blows some smoke into the air.
Naiken Ordal: I don't see the goddamned ring
Chris. | Zaku walks with Gahvin, dragging his Katan laziliy.
Gahvin: Aren't trolls notorious for eating things....?
Naiken Ordal: ** "Of course you know, the ring is in one of the troll's eyes!" **
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Naiken Ordal: ** "Which eye? Well...Am I lefty or right?" **
Gahvin: Wonderful!
Naiken Ordal: Man I don't fucking know...
Gahvin drops the cart and walks to the troll.
Gahvin: This shall be fun.
Chris. | Zaku: Just rip 'em both out.
Gahvin sticks his feet into both eyes, rummaging about.
Chris. | Zaku: Eww..
Gahvin fishes about and then says, "Got it....them...."
Gahvin: Wait....there's two....
Naiken Ordal: ...What?!
Gahvin: Yeah....
Chris. | Zaku: Two.. rings..?
Gahvin pulls them out.
Gahvin walks to them, shaking some of the gore off.
Gahvin hands them to Naiken.
Naiken Ordal: ** "One of them is the one I want, the other one will blow up" **
Naiken Ordal: Are you shitting me?!
Gahvin: Has she before?
Chris. | Zaku: I hate you guys.
Gahvin: Let's throw the rings until they blow up.
Gahvin: Zaku, CATCH!
Chris. | Zaku: Fu-..
Gahvin does a fakey-throw.
Chris. | Zaku jumps back, insitincitly.
Gahvin: Classic....
Gahvin: So...which ring is it?
Chris. | Zaku: Gahvin, I'm going to do terrible things to you while you sleep for that one.

Naiken Ordal: ...She's lefty, I believe.
Gahvin stands back, awaiting the explosion.
Naiken Ordal: Eh...Wait, which one's the left one?
Gahvin: The one in your right hand.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Naiken Ordal throws the left one to the air.
Chris. | Zaku starts walking away from the two.
Naiken Ordal: Wait..How can something that small blow up?
Naiken Ordal: ** "Binary explosives darling!" **
Gahvin backs up with Zaku.
Naiken Ordal: ** The thing blows up, making a gigantic fireball **
Gahvin: OOOOO...pretty...
Chris. | Zaku pulls his goggles down.
Gahvin: Well, let's keep walking, eh?
Chris. | Zaku: Agreed.
Chris. | Zaku just keeps walking back.
Gahvin grabs the cart and walks towards the cave.
Gahvin: C'mon, you wuss.
Naiken Ordal: ** The cave turns out to be rather short, a suddenly sunny forest behind it

**
Chris. | Zaku walks towards the cave.
Naiken Ordal gets in the cave, and goes to the other side
Gahvin: This is a change of scenery....and mood....
Gahvin stands at the other end, just staring.
Gahvin: Meh.
Chris. | Zaku 's ears twitch. "My crazy-bitch senses are tingling.."
Gahvin continues walking.
Gahvin: We'll take it one at a time.
Gahvin: C'mon, it will be fun.
Naiken Ordal: Wait...Does she know where we're going?
Naiken Ordal keeps on walking
Gahvin: You tell me....
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku pulls the cigar out of his mouth.
Chris. | Zaku: I hate you guys.
Gahvin: Hey, Zaku.
Chris. | Zaku: Yes..?
Gahvin: I'm thinking of a color.
Chris. | Zaku: Ok.
Gahvin: Want a hint?
Chris. | Zaku: Sure.
Gahvin: Everclear.
Naiken Ordal: That's a color?
Chris. | Zaku: Er..
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah?
Gahvin: No...it's a hint you dipshits....
Chris. | Zaku: Hey, don't call me a dip-shit, you tawt.
Chris. | Zaku: .// twat*
Naiken Ordal: Why would I care about what motherfuckign color you're thinking of?
Chris. | Zaku: I'm going to just put this out here, and guess black.
Naiken Ordal: ** You can see the sun falling on the horizon **
Gahvin: Because we are- 237 steps- bored out of our wits.
Naiken Ordal: It's getting dark...
Gahvin: And we're 13, 12 steps away from a trap.
Naiken Ordal: ** "Or not...!" **
Chris. | Zaku: I say, we run straight through.
Gahvin: I say you're stupid....
Chris. | Zaku: I think, you're -gay-.
Chris. | Zaku: Take that, bitch.
Gahvin: Is that the best you can come up with?
Naiken Ordal: // BRB
Gahvin: I feel so bad....
Chris. | Zaku: Bitch, don't make me go slice 'n dice on your ass.
Gahvin: It makes me want to go home and sleep with Naiko....
Chris. | Zaku: Think of the wonderful diseases I left there.
Gahvin: You have diseases?
Chris. | Zaku: I might.
Gahvin: .....
Chris. | Zaku: We all have diseases.
Chris. | Zaku: I mean..
Gahvin: Did you tell Narran that?
Chris. | Zaku: // Narran? Lol
Gahvin: //Wait....
Chris. | Zaku: // Lmao
Gahvin: //Wait...........................................
Gahvin: //FUCK! YOU ALL HAVE SIMILAR NAMES!
Gahvin: //I forgot the wife's name...
Chris. | Zaku: I don't know if I have diseases, or not.
Gahvin: Are you itchy?
Chris. | Zaku: Nope.
Gahvin: Burning...numbness....
Chris. | Zaku: And, I use condoms.
Gahvin: Condoms can't prevent all diseases....
Gahvin: Wait...what are crabs?
Chris. | Zaku: Lies!
Chris. | Zaku: Crabs live in oceans, you idiot.
Gahvin: No, Thorn mentioned them...
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin: He said something about the itchy crabs.
Chris. | Zaku: He must be really fucked up, if he has crabs on his crotch.
Naiken Ordal: // Back
Chris. | Zaku: I almost feel bad for Shelob.
Gahvin: Do shaved people get crabs?
Chris. | Zaku: I don't think so.
Chris. | Zaku: Do you shave..?
Chris. | Zaku: You -faggot-.
Gahvin: No....
Chris. | Zaku: Right..
Naiken Ordal: Shut the fuck up goddamnit!
Gahvin: Well, perhaps there are some things about Naiko you don't know.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku: I got there first, so..
Gahvin: ....
Naiken Ordal: ** "I decided to give you guys a break, so here's an empty space" **
Gahvin: I put a ring on her finger.
Gahvin looks up. "Thank you, Kari."
Chris. | Zaku: I broke her hymen, I win.
Gahvin: ....
Gahvin: Hy-men?
Chris. | Zaku: Oh, sorry, big-words.
Gahvin: Sounds painful....
Chris. | Zaku: See, I actually took the initiative to study up on vaginas.
Gahvin: ....
Naiken Ordal: ** "However, Naiken goes with me!" **
Chris. | Zaku: The hymen, is a layer of tissue that protects the vagina.
Gahvin: for over one and a half thousand years, I've been killing things like you. I had

no time.
Gahvin: Fine with us, Kari.
Naiken Ordal: Oh are you shitting me....
Gahvin: Just bring him back in the morning.
Gahvin: We...kind of need him...
Chris. | Zaku: Always practice safe sex.
Gahvin: So...by breaking it...you endanger her?
Chris. | Zaku: No, you see.
Gahvin: Are you stupid? Why would you break that?
Naiken Ordal: ** "I'm gonna break you, Naiken!" **
Chris. | Zaku: BEcause if you don't break it.
Chris. | Zaku: You can't get inside of it.
Gahvin: ....
Chris. | Zaku: It's like.. a covering.
Chris. | Zaku: The's inbetween the labia.
Gahvin: You lost me at hymen....
Chris. | Zaku: See, I am quite smart.
Chris. | Zaku: When it ocmes to vaginas.
Gahvin: Either that or it doesn't interest me.
Chris. | Zaku: Then you're -gay-.
Gahvin: Or I don't have to worry about it...
Gahvin: ....
Chris. | Zaku: Did you know that when a female is aroused her clitirous becomes erect?
Chris. | Zaku: I learned that the hard way.
Gahvin: Yes...Zaku....I'm gay....that's why I asked Naiko to marry me?
Naiken Ordal: Enjoy your fucking night of sleep. I gotta go fuck a bitch.
Chris. | Zaku: To hide your true-self.
Chris. | Zaku: Wait.
Chris. | Zaku rummages through his satchel.
Gahvin looks to Naiken. "Have fun."
Chris. | Zaku retrieves a condom, throwing it at Naiken.
Chris. | Zaku: Practice safe-sex you horny-kids.
Naiken Ordal: Oh trust me brother, this shit ain't gonna be enough.
Gahvin: I feel your pain....
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku throws another.
Chris. | Zaku: Then double it up.
Gahvin: Did you know condoms are made out of sheep intestines?
Chris. | Zaku: They leave a intresting after-taste.
Chris. | Zaku: So I've heard..
Gahvin: And I'm gay....?
Chris. | Zaku looks around with shifty-eyes again.
Chris. | Zaku: Yes.. yes you are.
Gahvin: Zaku...we don't need to make fun of you. You do the job quite nicely.
Naiken Ordal walks to the woods surrounding the flat area
Gahvin walks to the cart and begins pulling out blankets.
Chris. | Zaku: Fuck you.
Gahvin tosses Zaku a blanket.
Chris. | Zaku catches it.
Gahvin spreads his own blanket down in a bed of grass.
Gahvin plops down it.
Gahvin: //*on it
Chris. | Zaku wraps himself in the blanket, still standing upl
Chris. | Zaku: Hm..
Gahvin: So....
Naiken Ordal dissapears on the woods. All of a sudden he says. "Are you goddamned shitting

me?"
Gahvin: He says that a lot...it bothers me...
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku: I bet she actually has a dick.
Chris. | Zaku: And he just heard out the hard-way.
Chris. | Zaku: Literally.
Gahvin: I'm waiting for an arrow to hit you.
Gahvin: Now...this hymen you speak of...will I ever have to worry about it returning?
Chris. | Zaku: No.. no you don't.
Chris. | Zaku: After it's gone, it's gone.
Gahvin: Alright.
Chris. | Zaku sits down. "Gahvin, have you had the talk?"
Gahvin: I know the reproduction methods of my own species.
Naiken Ordal says, kind of muffled. "Wait goddamnit! Gah!"
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin: I have over eight-thousand kids.
Chris. | Zaku looks back at where Naiken was.
Gahvin ignores it.
Chris. | Zaku shrugs, and looks back to GAhvin.
Gahvin: He's fine....
Chris. | Zaku: I have five.
Chris. | Zaku counts his fingers.
Chris. | Zaku: Yeah, five.
Gahvin: Anyways, my eight-thousand kids.
Gahvin: How many partners have you had?
Chris. | Zaku: I lost count..
Gahvin: 428.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin: Yeah.
Gahvin: Wait....
Chris. | Zaku: You must be choke-full of diseases.
Gahvin: No....
Naiken Ordal: // When you guys fall asleep, we can continue to the next day
Chris. | Zaku: // Alright
Gahvin: //Alright.
Chris. | Zaku: // This is lulzy
Gahvin: Scratch that, about 1,428.
Gahvin: Yeah.
Chris. | Zaku: Ok, now your b-s'n.
Gahvin: And no, I'm not diseased.
Chris. | Zaku: I'll.. say.. around..
Chris. | Zaku: Maybe.. thirty, for me.
Gahvin: But I did get a bad case of chiton-rot once.
Chris. | Zaku: I dunno'
Chris. | Zaku: I can't count.
Gahvin: Anyways, I only have to worry about one girl.
Chris. | Zaku: 'Eh..
Chris. | Zaku: Me too.
Gahvin: I don't need to know the terms in order to please her.
Chris. | Zaku: I bet she's the man in the relationship.
Gahvin nestles into the blanket. "Good night, Zaku."
Gahvin: And no...
Chris. | Zaku lays down.
Chris. | Zaku: Mhm. I bet.
Chris. | Zaku looks at Gahvin. "Y'know, this is really awkward.."
Gahvin falls asleep.
Naiken Ordal: *Muffled* Gah! Baby goddamn! That doesn't go there!
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin is fast asleep.
Chris. | Zaku scoots closer to Gahvin.
Chris. | Zaku: Horny-kids these days.
Chris. | Zaku closes his eyes.
Gahvin suddenly pushes Zaku away with his leg.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku growls at him
Gahvin growls back.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku opens his satchel, retrieving a book.
Gahvin is still asleep, though.
Naiken Ordal screams like a girl.
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku opens his book, and takes a monocle from out of his bag.
Chris. | Zaku adjusts the monocle on his eye, and squints looking at the book.
Chris. | Zaku: Wait.. I can't read.
Chris. | Zaku throws the book behind him.
Chris. | Zaku looks at Gahvin. "Gahvin.. I'm scared."
Gahvin: //I lawled my milk all over the floor.
Chris. | Zaku: // Lol
Gahvin says sleepily, "Zaku...I'll protect you...now go to sleep...."
Chris. | Zaku: Can.. can you hold me?
Gahvin 's eyes wink on. "No...."
Naiken Ordal: Gyeeargh! Holy shit!
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku: Fuck you then.
Chris. | Zaku shouts out. "Naiken, take it like a man!"
Gahvin: It's okay...nothing will rape you....
Chris. | Zaku: That's the best-case scenario.
Naiken Ordal: That's not what you do with a fucking pineapple!
Gahvin: Not really....
Chris. | Zaku blinks.
Gahvin falls asleep.
Gahvin: Pineapples...good times....
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
[TnB|BAGEL]<{BT}>Jumbo_Grill entered chat.
Chris. | Zaku looks around. "You people freak me the fuck out."
Chris. | Zaku opens his bag again, retreiving a magazine.
[TnB|BAGEL]<{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //I'm here.
Gahvin: That's our sole purpose in life, Zaku....
Naiken Ordal: // Change name, join in
Chris. | Zaku adjusts his monocle, and looks at the magazine.
Gahvin: And you can't read....
Chris. | Zaku shows the Magazine to him, and points. "Pictures."
Gahvin: And I'm dumb...?
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Gahvin rolls over, facing away from him.
Chris. | Zaku flips to the next page.
Gahvin falls asleep.
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //Fuck
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: // I forgot
Chris. | Zaku glances at Gahvin, and scoots over closer to him.
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //I can't RP
Naiken Ordal screams. "I don't fucking want to watch that! *Splash* "
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //Naiko is in the black pyramid.
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //Searching for clues.
Chris. | Zaku picks his head up. "The fuck are you kids doing?!"
Gahvin: //You can visit....
Naiko | <{BT}>Jumbo_Grill: //Alone.
Gahvin turns over suddenly and hits Zaku in the head, knocking him out.
Chris. | Zaku: // I think we seriously need to put this on the forums
Chris. | Zaku: // This was pretty hilarious
Naiken Ordal: // We should
Gahvin turns back over and falls asleep.
Chris. | Zaku rubs his head, seemingly dazed but not knocked out.
Gahvin: *The rape continues as the two peacefully sleep. It's a long night for Naiken that

ends when the sun slowly rises.*
Chris. | Zaku wakes up, yawning, taking his monocle off.
Naiken Ordal shows up, infront of them, who are still sleeping. He has an apple on his

mouth
Gahvin 's eyes wink on and he looks about. He stands, checking the cart. "How was your

night, Naiken?"
Chris. | Zaku stretches, sitting up.
Naiken Ordal spits the apple. "She made me a fucking fruit salad."
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku points and bursts out into laughter.
Gahvin: Interesting. Zaku gave me something called 'the talk'...I think he did....
Naiken Ordal: And you don't want to know what the topping was...
Chris. | Zaku: . . .
Chris. | Zaku: Eww...
Gahvin: I want to know....
Chris. | Zaku: . . .

Plan for the next days by Geo.


Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: https://2img.net/r/ihimizer/img5/9646/propisition.png
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: K
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: So
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Basically
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: The shit colored green is plains
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: The forestish green is.. wel, forest.
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Surna's a bit.. heh.. blotted out
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: but you nkow basically where it is, i hope
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: So, assuming your path
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: goes down, south west
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: You'd go through those woods
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: On the mountain side
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: possibly
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: And then you'd reach that red dot, mayhaps?
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: And that's where the destinition is?
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Exemplar is in the tundra
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Shown by the grey
Naiken Ordal: Sounds very accurate
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: As you can see the darker grey is the valley
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Colder area
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Mostly snow
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: SO, as a checkponit since the forest is so thick right around Exemplar
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: you could possibly..
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: ..Either go through the forest
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Or go around the tundra
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: assuming you want to make the journey more..
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: ...idk. Epic?
Naiken Ordal: Very
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: You'd pass by quite a few mountains, some ight even be in the way
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: The part around surna is a bit lighter
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: the forest i mean
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: And then as it dips into the plains
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: it's very thick
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: and then lightens up
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: You might encounter
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ec/Shelobpj.jpg
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Something like this
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: in the forests
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Lots of big.. Fat.. Venomous spiders
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Very fast
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Very deadly
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: But easy to kill
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Rangers and hunters like to call them Puma Spiders
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Though they're rare, they're still...
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: They still should be avoided
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: You might find a few streams or the like in the forest
Kaliya [ GeoWulf]: Maybe a river

What's up with mocking Naiko every 5 seconds ._.
And Zaku, if you're watching this.

Jumbo_Grill wrote:

What's up with mocking Naiko every 5 seconds.

Because they don't like you. Isn't that obvious?

The immortal god emperor shall smite you....
Ohhh yeaa.... About that....
Does everyone know this passage? If so I wish to plan somthing out for this little group that I have ready for them.
*Grins and rubs his hands evily*

No hard feelings Jumbo, it's just what Zakus been told by people. And, we weren't just mocking Naiko, just happened to be brought up alot.

._.

Dear God, that was fun....